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Joke of the Day
"They found horse meat in food in the U.K. ... ... and horse piss in the beer in the U.S."
Next Joke
"Welcome to plastic surgery anonymous I'm seeing a lot of new faces in the crowd this week and I have to say i'm really disappointed."
"A lady that sat next to me on a plane freaked out when she realized that I am a muslim. I laughed so hard my grenades nearly fell out of my pockets."
"""KIDS, GET YOUR SHOES ON WE'RE LEAVING FOR SCHOOL IN SIX HOURS!!!"" -- Centipede parents"
"9 y/o daughter: dad, what's your favourite healthy food? Me: fruits. Your's? 9: Eggs Me: Good 9: like Reese's peanut butter eggs"
"How can you tell that pirates hid the communist manifesto Because an ""X"" Marx the spot"
"Emperor: How are my elite troops doing on Endor? Vader: They were all viciously murdered by teddy bears. Emperor: That sounds plausible."
"I guess I've cut back on my drinking... Time was, I'd buy a half gallon of bourbon and get drunk four times. Now I buy a half gallon and just get drunk twice."
"Why did the White Man go to the Moon? He wanted more land. -Heard this from a native friend of mine. I laughed my ass off."
"A joke that never stops giving.... Your mom."