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Joke of the Day

"Infatuation Bastard That was the punchline, here's the question... What did Pauline Hanson say when a Chinese man asked her how she cooks her chips?"

"Why did god invent whiskey? (x-post /r/drunkjokes) So the Irish would never rule the world"

"Please don't take my 'mmm hm's' as encouragement to go on with your story."

"Q: You're on top of Mount Everest. How do you get down? A: Pluck a duck."

"America needs to build a statue of the man who killed Hitler"

"what does a cowboy from colorado wear? a 420-gallon hat"

"Did you know that Princess Diana was on her cell phone when she died? She was also on the dashboard, the windscreen, the roadside..."

"What does a priest and McDonalds have in common? They both like to stick meat in their 10 year old buns."

"How many Budists does it take... How many Budists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. The change, if needed, will come from within."

"Why does the universe expand?.... All the Milky Ways. You get it."