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Joke of the Day

"No one your age has any idea what they're doing either. No matter what age you are."

Next Joke
 
"1. Cover elevator floor with glue. 2. Put ring on floor. 3. Wait for someone to kneel and get stuck. 4. ""Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!"""
"How can you tell a clock is hungry? It goes back four seconds"
"What do you call a tooth in a glass? A one molar solution."
"If a tree falls on a woman, does she make a sound? The real question you have to ask yourself, is what was that tree we doing in the kitchen."
"Hey let's meet somewhere for drinks and text the people we'd rather be hanging out with."
"Other kids wanted to be astronauts or doctors, when I was little I wanted to be a horse calendar"
"What's the difference between a homeless man and a trash can? One of them gets taken in every once in a while."
"My wife is not speaking to me. We watched an old video of our wedding and she realized that I said ""You'll do"" instead of ""I do."""
"If I was a funeral director, I'd tell everyone ""I'll see you later"" & then wink, because it's fun to freak people out."