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Joke of the Day

"Two reddit moderators walk into a bar [removed]"

"Positive people are less of a person They are missing electrons."

"My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down."

"Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember"

"Why do they call dogs K-9? Because K-10 are for pussies."

"*bursts into room Me: GUYS! GUYS! I FOUND A UNICORN Guys: Yeah sure,show us then! *holds up single kernel of corn *gets violently beaten"

"If Sam McCringle can mingle with a single bag of Pringles in the time it takes to sing a single jingle, with how many Pringles did Sam McCringle mingle? none... Pringles come in cans"

"CNN has confirmed that aliens might actually be involved in the disappearance of Flight 370. At least two illegal immigrants were caught on camera boarding the plane."

"Where's the safest place to hide money from a man? Under the soap"

"I may or may not have just tried unlocking the wrong car for 15 minutes."