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Joke of the Day

"Female aliens are invading earth and kidnapping men with large cocks. You're in no danger. I'm just writing you to say goodbye."

"A Linux Joke In computing, what's the only way to generate a truly random string? Put a Windows user in front of VI and tell him to quit."

"Why did the Little Mermaid run away with the fisherman? He had allure."

"I can't wait for the next Quantum Physicist triathlon. I'm going to stand beside the bikes and yell out their speeds. They'll get so lost they'll end back at the starting line."

"Me: Well hello again. I knew you'd be back. I seem to have that effect on people Fed Ex: Just sign here so I can leave"

"What do young ghosts call their parents? Deady and Mummy."

"Someone stole all the toilets from Scotland Yard Police have nothing to go on."

"Did you hear that Zsa Zsa Gabor was suing the doctor who amputated her leg? ...The Judge threw out the case because she didn't have a leg to stand on."

"Congratulations, ""journalists"" who tell celebrity gossip for a living. I didn't know you could get a degree in teenage girl."

"I drank too much water I'm going to pee for it later."