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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a slutty toaster? A crumb dumpster"

"A doctor reaches into his pocket and finds his rectal thermometer He says ""Shit, some asshole took my pen!"""

"Five out of six people are okay with Russian Roulette... ... The sixth one loves it to death."

"How To Impress Your Boss 1. Show up early. 2. Have all the tools you need. 3. Read the strategy guide. 4. Aim for the big glowing weak spot (usually the eyes)."

"POLISH JOKE Why do Polish people keep empty bottles in their refrigerator? For people that don't want anything to drink"

"What did the window say when it was cracked? Well this is a pane in my glass."

"Q: How do you kill a retard? A: Give him a knife and say ""Who's special?"""

"Chuck Norris was at an interview ... And he ended up giving the guy head but didn't give him the job."

"Why did the pharoah go to the dentist? Because egypt his tooth."

"There are only 3 lawyer jokes. The rest are all true."