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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a computer smoking weed ? High tech."

"I think semi-colons have gotten a bad rap. They should be re-branded as super-commas."

"They'll continuously make Fast & Furious movies until it's a bunch of old men trying to get out of a grocery store parking lot"

"In the time it took you to read this, Woody Allen made another film and it starred some big names and it was ok and now it's on DVD already"

"You can tell a lot about someone by the tank top they wear. For instance, if they wear a tank top, they're probably a dick."

"I tried to explain Pokemon to my 4-year-old. After hearing myself say it out loud, I'm pretty sure I ruined both of our childhoods."

"What do you call Jewish folk from New Jersey? Orange juice."

"The female praying mantis... knows how to get ahead in life."

"I am genuinely terrified of my Biology Professor I heard he has a lot of skeletons in his closet"

"Dad : son ,when I was your age I used to walk 6kms to school Son: oh now I get it Dad: get what? Son: why you didn't make it to university"