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Joke of the Day

"Professor X gets a lot of credit as a progressive considering his solution to a race conflict was ""give them their own school."""

"Hey, did you guys know you can do just about anything if you use asterisks? *rides T-Rex off into the sunset*"

"They said being blind would hinder my chances of becoming a comedian. I don't see them laughing now."

"Why would I be a horrible magician? Cuz I'll fuck a trick up."

"Just had a moment where I wanted to scroll down to read the comments looking at my bank balance online."

"Groundhog Day The Groundhog saw dead people, so we're due six more weeks of creepy Nationwide Commercials..."

"I remember as a child, lying in bed waiting for Santa to come... Then there was always that awkward silence as he got dressed and left."

"why do nice girls always go for the assholes? I don't even like pegging."

"Funny and strange video"

"My 4 year old is a comedian and loves jokes.. this is her favorite one... Why did the banana go to the hospital? Because he wasn't peeling very well."