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Joke of the Day
"Why did Microsoft skip to Windows 10? Because 7 8 9."
Next Joke
"Pet Shopping Paddy says ""Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador."" ""fuck that"" says Mick ""have you seen how many of their owners go blind"""
"Don't Be Racist Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!"
"Why is Donald Trump so intent on building a wall with Mexico? To stop the workers at his construction site from running back!"
"There is only two man made objects visible from space. The great wall of china and, Kim Jong Un's giant ass. cmon guys I cant do this all by myself."
"So I'm ordering a coffee... I tell the barista, ""French Roast, two sugars, no cream."" The barista responds, ""I'm sorry sir we're all out of cream, would you like your coffee without any milk instead?"""
"Next time you are in a restaurant, give this a thought. The fork you are using has been in the mouth of hundreds of people. Now look at the people eating right by you. Scary, right?"
"""Good luck with your little skits!"" -Shakespeare's mom."
"What did the salmon say when it hit the wall? ""Dam"""
"I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman: ""Where's the self-help section?"" She said that if she told me, it would defeat the purpose."