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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a sea mammal with a mission? A porpoise."

"Biden: Maybe we make our own country and he won't be invited Obama: Joe Biden: And MAYBE THIS TIME WE CALL IT THE BLACK HOUSE RIGHT BARACK"

"when she gives me her autograph I love it when she signs the restraining order without dotting the i with a heart, playing hard to get I see!"

"I have Electile Dysfunction Electile Dysfunction : the inability to become aroused over any of the choices for President put forth by either party in the 2016 election year."

"""Grandpa, why did everyone make a big deal out of selfies when they're just pictures, oh and thanks a lot for doing nothing about climate."""

"ME: Off to the concert with my friends WIFE: Say hi to everyone for me [later] ME [individually saying hi to 10,000 ppl] This is exhausting"

"Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and smell bad."

"Old people talk into cell phones like they hit the Caps Lock key on their voice."

"Q: What is the best Iraqi job ? A: Foreign Ambassador"

"So there is a First class only Indian Airline. Their motto is ""We will treat you passengers like Cattle"""