94462

Joke of the Day

"*Gandalf rollerblades into the club* ""YO DJ PLAY SOME DIRTY DUBSTE-- *slips on a drink & lands flat on face* ""SCRAP THAT CALL AN AMBULANCE"

"What do you get when you mix lemonade and ice tea? A dead golfer..."

"My wife's cooking is incredible. With a silent 'cr'."

"What's the difference between New Jersey girls and trash? Trash gets picked up."

"What did Dracula say to the teacher? See you next period."

"People are like the digestive system. In the end, they're all assholes."

"How do you spell that? t-h-a-t"

"Yo mama in a wheelchair and says ""You ain't gonna puch me 'round no more."""

"I'm lost at Costco but everyone here looks like my dad. Just gonna pick the one with the best groceries and start a new life I guess."

"kid doctor: [looking over charts] im not going to lie this is the worst case of cooties ive ever seen little girl: he said he'd been tested!"