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Joke of the Day

"How did Jesus get so ripped? He does crossfit."

"Any governments / terrorist groups looking to rule by fear should get some tips from spiders."

"The grass is always greener, but usually because it's synthetic AstroTurf."

"What did the Australian chess player say to the waiter when he finished his meal? Check, mate."

"Headline: World helium shortage over due to discovery of helium field. Scientist: (high voice) This new supply of helium is a game-changer"

"What do you call a well rounded, very intelligent gay man? A homogeneous homo genius!"

"I had my prostate examined the other day. After it was all over, the doctor left at the same time the nurse came in, and whispered the three words no one wants to hear. Who was that?"

"My sister asked if I stole her cream sweater. Uh, yeah. Who else would've stolen it? You think a burglar broke in and was like ""Cute top!"""

"What's the German super hero called? Ale-Man"

"A Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel stuck between his legs. Bartender: What's with the steering wheel? Pirate: Arr, it's drivin' me nuts!"