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Joke of the Day

"If space is a vacuum... Why is the earth so dirty?"

"What do a gay dolphin and a car that leaks oil have in common? Chances are, both have blown a seal"

"Are you fu*** crazy? A squirrel with a nut having sex. Another squirrel sees her and asks: ""Are you fucking crazy?"" ""No, I'm fucking nuts!"""

"[date] W: I'm really into astronomy. M: Oh! What's your sign? W: The one that knows the difference between science & superstitious idiocy."

"a quick zinger If your uncle jack helped you off a horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse?"

"British people must really like Leia in the new Star Wars movie. Stiff upper lip!"

"What's the difference between my dick and my shot gun? my daughter didn't cry when the gun went off in her mouth!"

"My son was kicked out of school when a girl came in and wanked him off... I said, ""Son, that's 3 schools already... Maybe teaching isn't for you."""

"How did the paramedics know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head and shoulders in the glove box"

"Why did the semen cross the road? Because I put on the wrong pair of socks this morning."