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Joke of the Day

"Obama: ""I have no more campaigns to run...because I won both of them"" Biden like 2 years later: LOL OH I GET IT. HES BEEN PRESIDENT FOR TW"

"I think the large hand on my watch is lagging. Sloppy seconds"

"Why did the riot police show up early to the protest? They wanted to beat the crowd."

"My wife is not speaking to me. We watched an old video of our wedding and she realized that I said ""You'll do"" instead of ""I do."""

"What is similar between Sharks and Humans? The Great ones are always white."

"What do you call four Mexicans drowning? Cuatro sinko"

"What do Jews and Snorlax have in common? They always lie"

"Why do smart people wear glasses? Because as resolution goes down performance goes up. This is a little bad but...."

"What does a fat person, a match, and a phone have in common? Cellulite."

"I hate when I'm cruising in my convertible, hair blowing in the wind, then realize I'm just sitting on my ride-on lawnmower. Drunk. Again."