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Joke of the Day

"If someone asks what you're doing today, grab a knife & yell ""SOMETHING I SHOULD'VE DONE A LONG TIME AGO!"" Sounds way cooler than ""Napping!"""

"God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, but He probably hired Steve to help decorate the garden."

"Save some A's for the rest of the animal kingdom, aardvarks."

"Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range."

"What goes clop clop, clop clop, Bang! Bang! Clop clop... An Amish drive-by shooting."

"Choose your friends carefully, They are the ones who tag you in photos."

"Believe me if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows!"

"What do you call a fish with no eye? FSH"

"Love is like peeing yourself.... everyone can see but only you feel the warmth."

"What hangs at a man's thigh, and wants to poke the hole it's often poked before? A key."