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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Barbie and Street Fighter? In Barbie, Ken doesn't beat the hell out of women."

"I just fake-went-to-the-bathroom to avoid someone. He followed me in. I don't think the pee noises I'm making with my mouth are working."

"How do Japanese chihuahuas say hello? ""Konnichihuahua"""

"When the machines rise up against us humans, I really hope ... ...I really hope I'm nowhere near a dildo factory..."

"Someone told me flowers had sex organs... ....what a load of Poppycock!"

"They tried to make me go to rehab, and I said ""My HMO doesn't cover residential treatment."""

"I was shocked to walk in on my son playing with his privates... Those toy soldiers were supposed to be his surprise birthday gift..."

"I once met a girl with twelve boobs. Sounds fake, dozen tit?"

"How is there not an STD Clinic called, ""Clap on Clap off""?"

"Shakespeare & The Beatles walk into a pub... ...Landlord says, ""sorry mate, you're barred and those guys are banned""."