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Joke of the Day

"Some of my Satan worshiping friends invited me to an open discussion on Satanism... I'm not a Satanist myself, but I do like to play Devil's advocate...it was very confusing."

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"So you like limericks, huh? On the Breast of a woman named Gale was tattooed the price of her tail and on her behind for the sake of the blind was the same information in braile."
"Can women really make you a millionaire?? The answer is YES only if you are already a billionaire"
"Why did the drill sergeant get a dishonorable discharge? He couldn't keep his hands off his privates"
"At Christmas, it's important to pause and remember all those who have wronged you this year and how you can wreak vengeance on them in 2017"
"What do you use to wipe off a table after breakfast? A ragamuffin. Knew it was a dadjoke as soon as I saw my 9 year old roll his eyes."
"In case you haven't checked Facebook, It's hot today, the fireworks were beautiful, and 32 friends invited you to play candy crush!"
"The U.K. Summarized in two sentences. ""No Scotland, you cannot leave the UK."" ""Hey Scotland, let's leave the EU."""
"If you combined all the movies of Rob Schneider and made them into one single movie, it would be an extremely long movie."
"Do you know why they are called dad jokes? Because of the people that fathered them."