92180

Joke of the Day

"Why do scientists call helium , curium and barium the medical elements? Because, if you can't helium or curium , you'd barium!"

"forrest gump (1994): this film gave me very unrealistic expectations of what my life would be like as a huge idiot. 2/10"

"Did you hear about the Agnostic? Did you hear about the Agnostic Insomniac with Dyslexia? He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog."

"I just saved thousands on child support by never getting laid."

"Why doesn't Mrs. Clean get pregnant? Because Mr. Clean comes in a bottle."

"How does a cow do math? With a cowculator!"

"My 6 year old is telling me a story, oh wait, now he's 9."

"Woman's rights Not an april fools joke."

"If I ever start a customer service company, I'm going to name it 'Hold Please'."

"What did the boy say when his dog died? I'm gonna miss you buddy, you were my best friend."