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Joke of the Day
"I had small wookiee steak for dinner... ...it was a little chewie."
Next Joke
"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A Lickalotapus."
"Me: I'm so over him Vodka: No you're not, you should text him Me: Really? Vodka: Yes! 25 times"
"""So why do you wanna work at Petsmart?"" *imagines running out of the store with all the dogs in my arms* ""I'm a people person."""
"he doesnt always use the internet, but when he does, he shares recipes & inspiratiomal quotes. he is..the most pinteresting man in the world"
"Shout out to... Everyone who doesn't know the opposite of in."
"Saw an offer up at a pet shop selling unwashed dogs 'Buy one get one flea'"
"Why do porn directors prefer real Christmas trees? Because they don't need fluffing."
"""I don't care how goodlooking you are if you don't have any brains."" -Zombies"
"An athiest, a redditor, and a narassist walked into a bar... He was immediately thrown out for being under 21"