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Joke of the Day
"The Masochist begged the Sadist, ""Beat me, beat me!!"" The Sadist said, ""No"""
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"A Jew Gesundheit"
"Why are high end clocks designed and made in Switzerland? As they don't get arrested for doing their job as they do in America!"
"My pregnant wife just confessed she listens to R&B I'm uncertain if I should break up with her in text or just let her figure it out."
"I've decided to start a new line of 'extra-shatter' measuring sticks. Because rulers were made to be broken."
"WHAT'S a pirate's fav'rite Letter? Aye, ye think it be RRRRR, but it's the C."
"Neil Patrick Harris couldn't host a tapeworm without a musical number. #Emmys"
"What do all 'Tickle Me Elmo' toys receive before leaving the factory? Two test tickles."
"A chick with twelve boobs... Sounds crazy, dozentit?"
"I went to the doctor this morning and I have mono. At my age I think I should have surround sound."