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Joke of the Day

"What do you call Irish sunscreen? A pub."

"I shouldn't have agreed to be a cowboy's target dummy for lasso throwing practice. How did I get roped into this?"

"Mum: Why hasn't ________? been around lately? I thought you were good friends? Me: Because he turned into a cunt."

"Urethra! I've done it! ...says the gynecologist after a spectacular discovery. ""I don't think that's quite right sir,"" says the patient."

"I don't want to learn karate but I really need a new belt"

"How are the Seahawks and my girlfriend similar? they both can get 16 shoved down their throat without choking"

"One of my friends went up to my Portuguese dad.... and asked ""You're Portuguese, right?"" He said ""No, I'm Portugoose. There's is only one of me"""

"I'm single because I'm pretty good at recognizing crazy."

"The Navy is beginning to recruit blind men. They are sending them out to sea."

"So pinocchio was going down on a girl... The girl then says YEAH! Eat that pussy pinocchio get it!"