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Joke of the Day
"Looking back 2016 was a very eventful year. But I guarantee 2017 will trump it."
Next Joke
"Deep in the black void where my heart once beat, there lies a small, glowing ember-- oh wait no that's a Cheeto."
"I hate it when candidates put signs on your lawn without even asking your permission. Who the hell is 'Foreclosure'?"
"Doctor: ""I have the results of your test. You're gonna have to stop masturbating."" Me: ""Oh no! Why doctor?"" Doctor: ""Because I'm trying to talk to you, and it's very distracting."""
"Who has more money than God? His Ex-Wife."
"I hear Apple have released a line of people movers They call it Ivan"
"What do you call a fake noodle? ...*dramatic pause*... An imPASTA!"
"Girls just wanna have funds."
"A skelington walks into a bar orders a beer and a mop"
"Lara Rabbit: Do you think that's Sophie's natural color? Zara Rabbit: Only her hare dresser knows for sure."