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Joke of the Day
"Question: What goes up and never comes down? Answer: Up"
Next Joke
"To much precaution... Two security guards obtained me at the airport after they opened my luggage and found some IcyHot patches, they said: I was packing heat."
"Who says time travel doesn't exist and we can't go back in time? America just did."
"My circumcision left me quite sore. I couldn't walk for two whole years!"
"What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken. Edited for spelling, even though the guy was a stuffy old turd about it. :D HEYOOO"
"Order by telephone only. A friend of mine went to buy a sim card. Turns out you need to call ahead to get one."
"What do you call an insect with magical powers? A spelling bee."
"The first rule of Thesaurus Club is you do not talk about, name, hint at, refer to, discuss, or mention Thesaurus Club."
"Guy in the club: *lifts up his shirt* I do 400 crunches a day. Me: How many more until you get a personality?"
"What do you call a guy from China who is confused? Disoriented."