90360

Joke of the Day

"What did the two narwhals say at midnight? Nothing, they just baconed."

"My wife asked me what I want to do with her body... Apparently ""identify it"" wasn't the right answer."

"In this economy I sometimes have to make tough choices. Like between eating or buy that cover for my iPad."

"You know you're diplomatic when... you can tell someone to go to hell in a way that makes them look forward to the trip."

"I want to start a Bantu Saliva cover band... And call it ""Click Click Boom"". ^I'll ^^show ^^^myself ^^^^out."

"I was listening to 80s music today. You just can't beat Tina Turner. Unless you're Ike Turner."

"I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance By putting it into reverse and fleeing the scene of the accident"

"I'm not fucking stupid. I mean, I was, but we broke up."

"Dear NFL: Super Bowl. I'll just let them process this a little bit. They should do something by the time I'm up tomorrow."

"I waited around all morning for the mailman so I could grab his hand through the mail slot."