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Joke of the Day

"The worst part of kissing a perfect 10.... is how cold the mirror feels on your lips."

"There are 3 types of comments I hate. 1. Unrelated ones. 2. Lists. 3. Ironical."

"A horse-drawn carriage sounds really romantic until you realize horses can't even hold a pen and the carriage just looks like a scribble."

"Where do one-legged waitresses work? IHOP. Tipping your waitress takes on a whole new meaning."

"Do I turn left when nothing is right? Or do I turn right when there's nothing left?"

"What's a calender's favorite fruit? Dates."

"You can say that Hodor was Branwashed."

"How do you confused people in the 90s? Tell them ""In 2016, we will be able to refer to someone as ""Sir and/or Ma'am"" And still be assuming someone's gender."""

"My 5-year-old niece's twist on an old pirate joke **Question:** Why did the pirate have trouble with the alphabet? **Answer:** Because his 'I' was all jacked up. *...she cracks me up*"

"""Doctor, tennis has caused bad pain in my forearms"" -There's nothing I can do ""There isn't?"" -Not until you bring in your other two arms"