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Joke of the Day

"When the picture of the vampire's grandmother crashed to the floor in the middle of the night what did it mean? That the nail had come out of the wall."

"I made a bet with my sister that I could make a working car out of spaghetti.. ..you should have seen her face when I drove pasta."

"Where do police put their drinks? Copholders"

"i don't always watch soft core porn, but when i do i watch XX. stay horny my friends."

"What is the difference? What its the difference between a quarter and a guy? Neither gets had when you want tail"

"When I get to my deathbed.... I hope it's a tempurpedic."

"First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra."

"The best part about pooping with the bathroom door open in the morning is being able to see everyones face at Starbucks."

"What's the difference between you and an egg? An egg gets laid."

"Rosa Parks her ass on the bus seat"