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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference? What its the difference between a quarter and a guy? Neither gets had when you want tail"

"What's the difference between a goldfish and a mountain goat? Goldfish like to muck around the fountain."

"(in a rowboat with 6 starving people) ""I think you mean ""WHOM should we eat first"""

"What do you call a gay satanist? Sack-Religious"

"I predict the iPad's small-but-not-quite-small-enough size will be a source of great consternation for fanny pack enthusiasts."

"Is Google male or female? Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion. ^^^nyuk, ^^^nyuk, ^^^nyuk"

"Headline: ""American Pharoah Wins 1st Triple Crown Title Since 1978"" That is one long-lived horse."

"I found my first grey pubic hair today. I can accept getting old, but it was in my Big Mac."

"Valve is like a deadbeat dad.... They both do well on creating, but suck at taking care of the offspring."

"What do you get when you put a number 1 and a number 2 on your calculator? A huge mess."