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Joke of the Day

"[moments after time traveling to 1863] LINCOLN: four score & seven years ago ME: [behind a tree] JUST SAY IT NORMAL"

"A double-amputee walks into a bar Then he remembers he's already legless and walks out again."

"Gay Mafia Did you hear about those two gay guys in the mafia? One whacked the other one. http://earlmcgerd.tumblr.com/"

"Joke of the Day 6/13/14 I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair."

"Me: ""You kids aren't getting any more toys until you take care of the ones you have!"" Grandma: ""Here are 8,000 new toys just for existing."""

"Irony My friend was trying to explain to me that I don't understand the concept of irony... which is ironic because we were standing at a bus stop."

"If you're thinking of getting a hairless cat, go the extra mile and get a catless cat."

"Adam hates going out for a meal with God. He always steals his ribs."

"I came home from the gym today staggering and sweating after pushing my body to the limit. And all I did was sign up."

"British sense of humour"