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Joke of the Day

"How can you tell if you're on a Starcraft diet? Not enough minerals."

"Males ejaculate at 27 mph. That explains why its illegal to do it in a school zone."

"When idiots talk to me, I just imagine they're saying, 'I'm an idiot,' over and over. Makes it easier to nod in agreement and not get cross."

"Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, ""Do you know how to drive this thing?"" ... There's the door. I will show myself out."

"Chalant isn't even a word. Well played nonchalant. Well played."

"Islam? No. Is pork. That's not Halaled."

"I've been told I look like a young Denzel Washington's white neighbor."

"I'm writing a book about Indian food... It's gonna be a naan-fiction."

"What do you do with a no-legged greyhound? Take it drag racing"

"English Teacher: So class we're going to be talking about Biased today ""So Fox News?"""