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Joke of the Day

"I started 2016 with a goal to lose 20 pounds Only 30 more to go and I'm there!"

"An insanely hot girl sat across me in the train this morning and our eyes met. I thought I'd have a raging boner. But then she had one first."

"Your perfume/cologne should reward someone for getting close, not punish them for being in the same building."

"do you guys have PC & cheese? i'm not really a mac guy"

"Found a fly on his back by my keyboard. So dead. So sad. Put a cocktail umbrella by his head. Now he looks like he's suntanning."

"In Summertime, wow do you tell the difference between an American-born Arab and a Middle Eastern-born Arab? Heatstroke."

"Robin and Batman Robin: Knock Knock Batman:Who's there? Robin:NOT YOUR PARENTS!"

"There were 5 peanuts walking down the street... ...and one was assaulted...peanut."

"I'm in the terminator musical. I'll be Bach."

"What did the guy say after he finished jacking off? Well that got a load off my mind."