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Joke of the Day
"My humour is so black... ... it started picking cotton."
Next Joke
"A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it."
"A cheetah stalking its prey would envy the velocity at which I click the skip button when Apple Music plays a Nickelback track"
"My goal for 2017.... ....is to accomplish the goals of 2016 which I should have done in 2015 because I made a promise in 2014 and planned in 2013"
"Q: What do you call a truckload of vibrators? A: Toys for Twats."
"A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside."
"How many dead memes does it take to change a light bulb? Over 9000."
"I googled your mom last night. I had to open two tabs."
"Why does my abusive mother hate vegetables? Beats me."
"Last night I tried a new Thai restaurant. It was nice... They had a pick your own kitten cage on the counter."