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Joke of the Day

"Fact: A lot of women turn into good drivers. Lesson: If you're a good driver, watch out for women who are turning."

"If I were Luke Skywalker it would have taken me about six minutes to turn R2-D2 into a bong."

"I never thought that eating a bowl of Alphabet Soup could help me overcome constipation. But here I am, in the loo, having a massive vowel movement."

"If Jesus could walk on water and cucumbers are 96% water and I can walk on cucumbers does that mean the other 4% accounts for Jesus's dick?"

"POKER ANIMALS Q: What animal should you never play cards with? A: A cheetah!"

"Well if you cant buy babys at Babys R Us what in the world do they sell?"

"Why is Reddit called Reddit? Because you've probably read it before."

"""This birthday cake certainly is crunchy."" ""Maybe you should spit out the plate!"""

"Three guys are on a boat with four cigarettes, but they don't have any matches or lighters. What do they do? They throw one cigarette overboard and the entire boat becomes a cigarette lighter."

"What do you call a greedy crab? Shell fish......"