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Joke of the Day

"What do you call Barrack Obama with a bad spray tan? Orange is the new Barack! edit: Typo on el presidente's name."

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Some really obscure number, you've probably never heard of it."

"Why was the Japanese man so careful when walking in his house? It was made of pranks."

"Ancient people: turned grapes into wine, agave into tequila, and sugar cane into rum. Modern people: turn soy, rice, or almonds into milk."

"Today, I saw that my ironing board cover was wrinkled. I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because irony has the word iron in it."

"If you are following Facebook on Twitter, you have reached a new level of retarded."

"Ugh, Amazon Prime takes two whole days for delivery. I wish there was a way I could buy things and get them immediately."

"Q: How does a stereotypical blonde spell Farm? A: E-I-E-I-O."

"Me: ""You kids aren't getting any more toys until you take care of the ones you have!"" Grandma: ""Here are 8,000 new toys just for existing."""

"What is the difference between a Ritz cracker and a lesbian? One is a snack cracker and the other is a crack snacker."