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Joke of the Day

"Guy [beating me up for making a joke at an inappropriate time]: whos funny now you piece of shit Me: wait, you thought i was funny before?"

"Damn girl, are you a condom? Because after I get you off my D, I never want to see you again."

"Punchline Challenge: ""And by the way, you've got a lovely home!"" What's the setup ?"

"What grows when you squeeze it, explodes if you rub it too hard, and children love it? A balloon animal!"

"A pencil sketch artists' greatest dilemma..... 2B or not 2B?"

"Why is there no Walmarts in Afghanistan? Because there's a Target on every corner."

"A sober Irishman arrives goes home after work... That's it."

"I couldn't get past first base with the native girl she had her reservations"

"My new hobby: Seeing animals in old films like westerns, and saying ""I can tell you something about that animal."" ""It's dead now."""

"How do you figure out if Will Smith committed a crime? Dust for Fresh Prints! (i this version better than any snowstorm b.s.)"