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Joke of the Day

"""listen up, I'm only going to show you this once!"" ~ suicide bomber teacher."

"I updated my drivers on my laptop and now I have all kinds of pop ups...thanks Microsoft!"

"[arguing with friend about chemistry] *cop walks up* do we have a problem here? Me: No. We will find a solution once you argon, officer."

"Initially I thought I would rather catch herpes than feelings. But then I realized herpes are forever."

"[Turing Test] Tester: Let's start with an easy one, the square root of 29241? Subject: 171! Tester: Subject: I meant, idk math is hard. lol"

"What type of computer is unusually large? A Dell"

"[job interview] What experience do you have plucking chickens? Me: See all those hairs on my chin? No. Me: Exactly."

"If I had a dollar for every time somebody got the punchline wrong I'd have a lot of euros"

"Michael Jackson to be recycled"

"My doctor told me that I have syphillis, gonnorhea and chlamydia. On the positive side... HIV."