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Joke of the Day
"Knock knock . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Come in"
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"Why do they have fences around a cemetery? Because people are dying to get in."
"Helium Walks into a bar and orders a beer the bartender says sorry we don,t server noble gases here He Doesnt React"
"How many animals can fit into a pair of pantyhose? Ten pigs, two calves, one beaver, and an ass."
"All I want from life is to be able to respond ""crystal"" when someone angrily asks me if they've made themselves clear."
"Wanna hear a joke about iron? I'd tell you but there's a Fe."
"I woke up with an erection the other day... It worried me because it wasn't mine"
"LPT: If your phone gets water damage, leave it in a bowl of rice overnight. When you're sleeping, Asians will come to eat the rice and will fix your phone for fun"
"*Drives by train wreck* Train wreck:""I have a boyfriend."""
"Me: [getting stabbed by criminal] buddy this seems illegal"