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Joke of the Day

"I was sad when I learned Steve Irwin died... .. but at least he died the same way he lived: with animals in his heart."

Next Joke
 
"I started a band called 999 megabytes 6 months ago. We still haven't got a single gig."
"Bread is not emotionally mature enough to have threesomes When you spread your nuts all over one slice, the other gets jelly."
"Me: Which cup do you want? 2-year-old: That one! Me: Let's pick a different one. 2-year-old: No! *drinks milk from a shot glass*"
"My wife said in the morning ""You are an idiot""... while combing her hair in front of the mirror when I walked by."
"men prefer large boobs 9 out of 10 men prefer large boobs. The other man prefers the 9 men."
"What do you call a psychic dwarf running from the law? A small medium at large"
"All of the good tweets are either married or gay."
"I have a bumper sticker that says COP KISSER explicitly to make it awkward when a police officer asks if I know why they pulled me over."
"Happy Greek Easter! Which Greek God loved to collect animals? Zoos"