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Joke of the Day
"I wonder how many kids with dyslexic parents are getting gifts from Satan tomorrow? ZING!"
Next Joke
"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you do criticize them, you're a mile away, and you have their shoes."
"""Why did you leave your last job?"" -I had a typo in a tweet. ""Mistakes happen!"" -I worked for Yahoo Finance. ""Thanks for coming in. Bye"""
"What candy is traditionally served at a Jewish wedding. Mazel toffee."
"there's a new chocolate bar being sold in the middle east called Allahu Snackbar"
"Beer makes me feel invincible. Vodka makes me feel innvienceablrerrer. *falls down*"
"I asked a Chinese girl for her number... She said ""sex! sex! sex! Free sex tonight!"" I said ""wow"" Then her friend said,"" she means 666-3629"""
"whats the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? the park bench can hold a family of four"
"""You, the horse you rode in on AND the horses mother!"" ""What about the horses father?"" ""I already mentioned YOU once!"""
"What do you call a Pokemon with a tiny head? Zikachu"