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Joke of the Day

"The way I pronounced ""prix fixe"" should be enough for you to figure out that I can't afford to eat here."

"My parents are so poor.... If I dont wake up with a boner Christmas morning I'll have nothing to play with."

"My ex is going to make some guy very happy one day but completely miserable the rest of the time."

"*At the ouija board* Me: Err... mom? Can't we just... Ouija board: A-N-D A-N-O-T-H-E-R T-H-I-N-G"

"[CSI at Starbucks] ""Ma'am you've been robbed. Suspect is at large."" Barista: At what? ""At large"" At what? ""At venti?"" OMG HOW AWFUL!!!"

"How can the eurologist tell if he is looking at a man or woman? Well, there is a vast difference."

"I ran into your mom today. I ran into your mom earlier today, she told me she made $400.05 lastnight sucking dick. So I asked her ""Who gave you the nickel?"" She said ""They all did""."

"So it's been a few days since Phil and Ken got married under Irish law... And already Phil wants to Kilkenny"

"Hi, I'm your car's radio. I'll be playing terrible music during your trip, but once you get out of the car I'll play your favorite song."

"I want to tell you guys a small joke It's very puny!"