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Joke of the Day

"date: so wat do u wana do next me: why dont we slip into somthing more...convertible [climbs into ferrari] date: omg wow is this ur car me: no"

"How Do they say ""F**k You"" in Hollywood? ""Trust Me..."""

"In the book I'm currently reading, there's a section that talks about the vagina. It's my favourite passage."

"Why do rabbits always get banned from CS:GO? Because they're always bunny-hopping."

"I'm so sorry What would you call the Islamic State if they tried to take over Antarctica? Ice-is I'll show myself out."

"Last week, a girl at a local bakery backed into the bread slicer... Disaster."

"Did you hear about the witch who did a four year course in ugliness? She finished it in two."

"I finally figured out Donald Trump You have to ruin America first if you want to make it great AGAIN."

"She was a no-nonsense, high powered executive who played hard but never had time for love. He was a dog who thought he was people."

"I hurt my back while cutting down a tree. Guess you could say I have lumber problems."