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Joke of the Day
"A penis walked into a private club. Thank God he was a member."
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"Abortion is an out of body experience for fetuses"
"Two wrongs don't make a right. And two half-wits don't make a wit."
"My lesbian neighbors gave me a Rolex for my birthday. It's nice, but I think they misunderstood me when I said ""I wanna watch"""
"Knock Knock Who's there... Little Boy Blue... Little Boy Blue Who... Michael Jackson..."
"A black man goes into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder... The bartender looks at the parrot and says, ""Wow! That's a beauty. Where'd you get him?"" The parrot replies, ""Africa""."
"What do you call an exercise group run by Jesus Christ? Crossfit."
"If I stalked you any harder, you'd be a missing person."
"Fifteen years ago I asked my high school crush out on a date, yesterday I asked her to marry me... ... She said no both times."
"For some reason, Spanish-speaking visitors to Britain think we worship flight attendants... I suppose it's understandable given that our national airline is called British Heroes."