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Joke of the Day

"There's way too much nudity on TV programs these days... I just sit there shaking my fist at them."

"What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeye."

"*knock knock* whos there? sir theres been an accident. theres been an accident who?"

"The only food in Hell is the part of the popcorn kernel that gets stuck between your teeth. Also they have an Olive Garden."

"I saw a dwarf escaping from jail down the side of a wall As he passed by, he sneered at me, and I thought, ""That's a little condescending."""

"What's Green and has 5 Wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels! Shnockers"

"The only way to make conservatives feel threatened by climate change is to convince them the climate is gay."

"Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks."

"If someone knocks on your door, knock back from the other side. That someone will go away. It works. Trust me, I just tried it this morning."

"Why can't they use PC's as word-processors in Poland? The screens keep on filling up with white-out."