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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to return this pack of gum. They taste awful. ""Sir, those are Band-Aids."" Oh, I'd like to return these Band-Aids. Someone ate some."

"Lawrence starts cooking Lawrence checks Twitter Lawrence smells smoke Lawrence Fishburne"

"Little Johnny complains to mom at home, ""Mom, our teacher really doesn't know anything. He keeps asking us!"""

"Jesus fed 5000 people with one fish. Holy mackerel."

"What's the cheapest meat to buy? Deer balls. They're under a buck."

"What do you call an airplane's cockpit if it's staffed by female pilots? The Box Office."

"Which US state is friendliest toward the Japanese? Ohio"

"Men get frustrated because they don't understand how women think. Women get frustrated because they understand how men think."

"I just gave my secretary a baby shower. Well, a potential baby shower. If you know what I mean."

"I recently received a certificate for the breast stroke. Although the Judge called it a restraining order."