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Joke of the Day
"Jesus fed 5000 people with one fish. Holy mackerel."
Next Joke
"""Remember,"" said my boss, ""It takes 20 years to build a reputation..."" ""...And only a few seconds to say I had sex with your daughter."""
"(At a funeral) Im so sorry for your loss. I know how it feels to lose something you love. Last year Taylor Swift took her music off Spotify."
"An aviation enthusiast enters a bar. He asks, ""Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?"" The bartender laughs and says, ""Sorry, we only have plain chips."""
"I'm not saying she's a slut... But she's been banged more times than the first pipe on flappy bird"
"Time flies when you throw your alarm clock out the window."
"A man had three sons. One was a model, the second a hair stylist.. The third one was also a faggot."
"LPT: Easy way to soak up that extra alcohol in your stomach! Throw up on a sponge."
"You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you can't pick your friend's nose"
"What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen."