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Joke of the Day

"Why did the otter want to work at NASA? So he could go to Otter Space."

"I used to be in a band called The Prevention We hoped people would say we were better than The Cure."

"Why isnt Hitler invited to any BBQs? Cuhs he burns all the franks! Friend told me this, so im sorry if this has already been posted."

"Women need to relax and stop worrying so much about their bodies. Men aren't picky! Unless you're chubby or have a wrinkle or something."

"What did the girl with no hands get for her birthday? I don't know, she hasn't opened it"

"Every time I open my mouth, some idiot starts talking."

"Humpty Dumpty had a great fall But his winter wasn't so hot..."

"I had a dream I was going to the zoo to throw poop at the monkeys. No, not my own poop, thats just gross. Poop I found on the way to zoo."

"After learning about hieroglyphics, it makes you realize that Egyptians invented the emoji."

"Welcome home, half-empty bottle of diet coke. Meet your family: Salad dressing, expired creamer & mysterious takeout container."