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Joke of the Day

"How many Hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...it's this really obscure number. You've probably never even heard of it. No big deal."

"I just taped the TV remote to my dogs back so I'll never lose it again. Your move Apple."

"My favorite criminal intent: Robin Hood camping."

"Accidentally fell asleep at my grandmas funeral Wouldn't you know, I woke up with mourningwood."

"Just had a vegetarian meal with a nonalcoholic beverage at a restaurant whose produce are 80% locally grown. Feeling pretty smug."

"What's the difference between a guy with carry on luggage and a photon? The guy overpacked, and the photon is traveling light."

"What do you get when you have sex with a truck stop hooker? Gator-aids."

"What did the call of duty player say to his girlfriend about gaining weight? EX SO FAT"

"If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining."

"Q: What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Cancer."