81846
Joke of the Day
"What song do you sing if you're not a fan of Christmas? Sigh-lent night"
Next Joke
"If I were a fly on the wall, I'd probably be the slow, uncoordinated one that makes someone feel like a ninja for killing me on first try."
"Two Peanuts were walking down a dark alley. One was a salted."
"My friend's boyfriend is an optometrist and a sadomasochist. She says he's a real sight for sore eyes even though he can be a pain in the ass."
"Famous last words (silence)"
"One time, I considered becoming a gynecologist... ...but then I heard I'd be dealing with twats every day."
"Two antennas met on a roof . . . Two antennas met on a roof, they fell in love and got married, the ceremony was awful but the reception was brilliant."
"Why do weathermen name hurricanes after women? Because when they come they're wet and wild and when they leave they take your house and car with them."
"I removed the shell from my pet snail... because I thought it would move around quicker. Now it's just really sluggish"
"Chuck Norris is so awesome... He counted to infinity, twice."