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Joke of the Day

"How to impress your ex: 1. Get rich 2. Get more attractive 3. Get a tiger 4. Ride tiger everywhere in preparation for confrontation with ex"

"*Licks the fire in your soul *Burns tongue"

"I'm allergic to bears. One bear bite and it's straight to the ER for me."

"Why do Central Americans hop the U.S. Border in groups of 4 or more? Because the sign says no tres-passing."

"Why do most Vietnamese people seem like male prostitutes? Because they pay for everything with their Dongs"

"TIL %90 of statistics are made up. The other %10 comes after you make a title."

"What do cops do at a buffet? They pig out."

"Why do bad break-dancers get reduced prison sentences? Time served"

"I have no problems with buying tampons... I am a fairly modern man. But apparently they're not a ""proper"" present. (Jimmy Carr)"

"My crush said we can't be together because he's seeing another woman so I asked him to rub his eyes and check if I still look different."