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Joke of the Day

"What diagnosis did the veterinarian give to the dog with the funny walk? The dog has cerebral pawlsy."

"If all the Domino's employees in the world held hands, you'd have to make your own pizza."

"Why wasn't Sean Connery standing? He had to shit."

"What do you call one black person on the moon? A problem. What do you call every black person on the moon? *Problem Solved*"

"What did justin beiber say to his mom? I FOUND MY MICROSCOPE, now all I need is my lotion and tweezers"

"Did you know that if you squint at a cat and it squints back, it's the cat's way of saying ""What the f are you looking at?!"""

"What do you call a hump-backed cow that always wants to be the center of attention? A drama-dairy."

"Vegans are confusing people. If they care about animals so much, why do they eat all of their food?"

"All these things that aren't boobs and candy are really starting to piss me off."

"What does a musician train do when running from the law? Covers tracks"