8030

Joke of the Day

"What has over a hundred teeth and keeps back Godzilla? my zipper!"

"What's red and invisible at the same time? No tomatoes."

"School is like a boner, long and hard. Unless you're Asian."

"I decided to get my girlfriend & her sister new jackets for Christmas That is why I bought a pair of new gloves."

"If you need your iPhone repaired in Jerusalem, you obviously go to the Genius Bar. There, they don't serve alcohol..., ....but there's plenty of Apple Jews."

"A helicopter crashed on a graveyard Reports says over 500 dead."

"A guy walks in a library: - Do you have motivational books here? - Yes darling, right there, 3rd row, the second shelf. - Do you have any books closer?"""

"I'd be calmer defusing a bomb after four Red Bulls than watching someone else use my laptop."

"I thought /r/TwoXChromosomes was a mental retardation subreddit. The posts didn't convince me otherwise"

"With soaring gas prices and my abnormally sized feet, I am thinking that I will be Yabba-dabba-dooing it to work this week!"